Okay, gather round, everybody, gather round.
Gather round, please.
I have a, uh, a presentation.
lose your attention in about three minutes,
I slept 26 hours last night.
You still seem very sleepy. Can I start my presentation?
Where's the easel? No, no, I'm not using an easel... don't interrupt.
You want me to go get the projector? No, I don't want the projector.
Let me start my presentation, which is actually about that.
It's about innovation.
Let me do my thing, okay? Stop interrupting.
Okay, so, um, as we all know, um, tomorrow is St. Paddy's Day,
traditionally our most profitable day.
However, recently, profits have been declining.
Every year. And we need to change.
We need innovation.
We need to move Paddy's from the past and into...
the future, a mobile Paddy wagon.
Now, these days, people like to have things on demand.
So instead of having to go to a bar,
we will bring the bar to you.
Ooh, is that, like, a car service type of thing?
Where we pick people up and take 'em around from bar to bar
and jack up the prices?
The Paddy's wagon is the bar.
No, Dennis.
If we want to make money,
we need to honor ancient Irish traditions,
like serving an irresponsible amount of booze to people
who are genetically predisposed to having alcohol problems.
- Right. - You see,
St. Patrick started that tradition,
and that's why we celebrate him today.
Yeah... No, that's not what he did.
No, he-he played the flute for some kids,
and then he lured them into a cave somewhere,
- and he diddled them. - Nah.
You got him mixed up with the Pied Piper. Right.
St. Patrick didn't play the flute.
He drove the kids out of Ireland.
And then he molested 'em.
No, no, if-if St. Patrick molested kids,
I feel like, in the olden days of the Catholic Church,
All right, all right, look, g-guys, uh,
He drove the snakes out of Ireland.
I kind of want to just do the traditional thing
of, like, sticking around the bar
and-and trying to catch the leprechaun. No, no!
because he doesn't exist. Guys, please...
You know what... I don't even know
if I've set up my glue traps for him yet.
I mean, can you believe him? Okay, wait.
Who cares? Look, I'm trying to... You know what,
actually... I might want to get myself a flute.
I was thinking the same thing. We've been talking... you were?
Yeah, because I-I feel like it's a really fun...
I know we're kind of old, but... Go get a flute?
Go get a flute, yeah. Go get... go get a flute!
Everybody go get a flute!
...in the sixth grade, I feel like it's kind of simple.
Frank, look...
All right, let me explain it to you, at least.
No, he's gone.
So, Frank, here's the plan.
for the Web site.
And that will entice future end users
to comment and spread brand awareness
over various social media platforms.
Why don't we just take cash?
No, no, no, no. What I'm talking about's way simpler than cash.
It's-it's streamlined.
I'm lost. It's... I'm trying to explain it to you
and I feel like you're not even listening. I-I...
: Top o' the morning, you filthy lads.
I'm fixing to have a whale of a time in this here mobile pub.
I'm so sorry... what is this?
Crazy Paddy, you big, dumb arse.
Yeah. Why?
'Cause it's fun. No.
I thought that's the thing about St. Patrick's Day...